


driftwood

by Anonymous



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Concussions, Established Relationship, Injured Character, M/M, forest ranger jaeyoon, forest setting, hiking boyfies, how on earth does one Tag?, sanghyuk is..., youngbin is worried
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:53:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23862601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: The rain batters at the window, while the wind howls in the distance. Youngbin is cold and alone, and Sanghyuk has yet to return to the small cabin. This trip will either make or break their relationship.So, which will it be?
Relationships: Kim Youngbin/Lee Sanghyuk | Dawon
Kudos: 7
Collections: Anonymous





	1. Chapter 1

They had fought. 

It's the middle of the night and Youngbin has been trying to cool off in the cabin. And yet, Sanghyuk has not returned.

The rain is hitting the window and the sound reverberates within the small cabin. A chill has crept in with the rain and Youngbin is clutching his cardigan around his torso. 

His thoughts are wandering and wandering in the cold, candle-lit cabin. The lights had gone out a while ago and Youngbin had fumbled with his icy fingers to light the lone candle.

"He should be back by now," said Youngbin to the empty cabin. It felt lonelier without Sanghyuk, and Youngbin was slowly realising he hated it. Without Sanghyuk, there'd be a gaping hole in his life.

As the old adage goes, Sanghyuk completes him. Youngbin can't even remember a time when they weren't together. 

He can't even remember what they fought about.

Youngbin bites the inside of his cheek before he moves into action. He dons his waterproof coat and his hiking gear. Zipping the zips and clicking the various straps in place. Thankfully, he brought his smaller hiking bag so it doesn't weigh him down.

Turning on his torch, he heads out of the cabin and into the rainstorm. The rain slaps him in the face as soon as he enters it and he has to fight to see. The ground is muddy and slippery which doesn't help keep his worrying thoughts at bay.

His anger earlier had taken so long to dissipate, but maybe if it hadn't...

Now was not the time to be thinking about 'what ifs'! He needed to focus on finding Sanghyuk. 

Youngbin tries to picture the layout of the area in his mind. Sanghyuk can't have gone far -- they're in a forest after all -- so it's possible he might have gotten hurt or lost. Youngbin dreaded the thought.

The rain was relentless. But Youngbin could be more relentless. He wouldn't be with Sanghyuk if he wasn't. 

Thinking of when Sanghyuk agreed to date him, after a string of failures where everything went wrong, it made Youngbin feel more desperate to find Sanghyuk. 

"Sanghyuk! Sanghyuk!" Youngbin shouts but he doubts that Sanghyuk would hear over the rain. It adds to the hopelessness stirring in his chest though.

His eyes begin to sting. 

He reaches the ledge above the stream that they had walked by earlier that day. There's been a small landslide because of the storm, which is not unheard of. But it makes Youngbin's breath catch in his chest. 

'Please let him be safe,' he thinks. 

His silent wish seems to linger around his heart as it beats.

He climbs down to the stream, careful to watch out for any more landslides. There's a small reprieve from the rain down here and Youngbin takes a moment to catch his breath again. 

The stream of water has risen up and is slowly but surely carving itself deeper into the ground. He should check the area first before the stream, soon to be a river, consumes more of the land that borders it.

It's a big area so he takes his time scanning with the ground. 

His blue hiking boots are what make Youngbin's heart stop. 

Youngbin scrambles through the mud to Sanghyuk, slipping a few times as he runs. Sanghyuk is sitting with his back against a tree stump with roots that have been exposed by the rain. 

Youngbin kneels beside him and over the roar of water, shouts, "Sanghyuk!"

His eyes open by a fraction and he whispers, "Youngbin."

Sanghyuk is covered in dirt, it streaks his face and makes his hair stick to his forehead. Youngbin stares at him in panic for a moment, because he isn't sure what would be the safest way to move him.

"Sanghyuk, are you hurt anywhere?" He cups Sanghyuk's face in his hands when he doesn't respond and repeats the question.

Sanghyuk groans as he tries to move his limbs. "I think my left ankle is fucked." 

Youngbin swears to himself. He shifts his attention to Sanghyuk's ankle, gently lifting his trouser up his leg and eliciting another groan from Sanghyuk. There's no bleeding which is a good sign, but he needs to get Sanghyuk back to the cabin where he can examine it closer. 

"Shit," says Youngbin, as he feels the stream begin to lick at his boots, splashing onto his ankles. He looks back at it, and yup, it's risen even more.

"Sanghyuk, do you think you can stand with my support?"

Sanghyuk nods, croaking out a "Yeah."

"I'm going to give you a boost so you can climb the ledge first, and then we'll walk back towards the cabin." Youngbin let his thumb rub circles into Sanghyuk's thigh as he spoke to comfort Sanghyuk but also to help the blood circulate better. Youngbin isn't sure how long he's been stuck like this but he guesses at least an hour.

Sanghyuk gives him an affirmative and so Youngbin hoists him up from the ground. A small shout escapes from Sanghyuk’s lips as he accidentally leans on his bad ankle and he falls into Youngbin’s arms. Youngbin clutches Sanghyuk to himself and lets his lips touch below his boyfriend’s ear.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry…” he says as he leaves a kiss on Sanghyuk’s neck, hoping that it might soothe the pain or at least help Sanghyuk keep calm.

Sanghyuk gives him an answering kiss to his neck.

“It’s okay, Binnie. I can move now.”

Youngbin got Sanghyuk up onto the ledge with no issues. Sanghyuk had placed his good foot on Youngbin’s slotted-together-hands and rolled onto it once he had gained the height.

Youngbin decides to run up the ledge; there’s a slight slope and if he gains enough speed, it should be no problem. So, he goes for it. What he didn’t count for though was the mud slowing him down and parting beneath him with every step. 

He almost reached the top, but the mud begins to slide away under his feet and he’s falling away from Sanghyuk. 

Sanghyuk reacts quickly and catches his hand, his grip is strong but the rain and mud win, and Youngbin’s hand slips from his.

“Youngbin!” Sanghyuk’s scream pierces the sounds of the storm. He watches his boyfriend fall back and into the swift stream that’s grown fiercer than before. Youngbin hits his head and the concussion makes him powerless to the stream.

Youngbin becomes engulfed by frozen water and he’s helpless as he loses sight of Sanghyuk, and his mind devolves into nothingness.


	2. Chapter 2

Youngbin had never known what it felt like to be a piece of driftwood. He’d never sought the feeling, but somehow life decided to let him know. By some trick of fate, and by the hand of the universe, he had slid down that slope and into the stream. He had hit his head and this left him merciless to the force of the water. Youngbin drifted in and out of consciousness, rendering himself useless against the fighting water and leaving him to merely become a piece of driftwood.

He found it pleasant in a way.

For his whole life, he had fought and clambered his way to where he is now. Not once did he let his life drift and flow. Youngbin constructed his own future, because he could, and because that’s what he was told to do.

That very same way of thinking had led to his fight with Sanghyuk.

Hiking was something they both enjoyed. It was a common interest that brought them together when they became friends, which eventually turned into something more than friends. However, they both had their ways of approaching it.

Sanghyuk was a very easy-going person, it was one of the many things Youngbin loved about him, and he was especially easy-going when hiking. He wanted to explore at his own pace and go where his heart wanted.

Youngbin was quite the opposite. He plans for hiking. He researches the trails ahead of time and makes a schedule that he should follow so he can say he did all the trails and got the most out of his time.

You, dear reader, probably see how this might become a problem. 

While they have been together for 2 years, this trip was the first of its kind. They had never been hiking together before this. 

When they arrived, they both had different expectations and that soon became apparent.

On day two of their four-day hiking trip, it all came to a crest. They argued viciously, cutting remarks were thrown and it grew more heated.

The argument had ended with Sanghyuk slamming the door of the cabin shut.

Now, Youngbin is simply a piece of driftwood. Being washed away by a river of water, and totally oblivious to its surroundings; the storm raging on, the rocks that are in its path, and the person shouting at it to wake the hell up.

Although, that last one was quite peculiar to a piece of driftwood.

The voice wasn’t familiar at all, and Youngbin wishes he couldn’t listen to it. He wishes he could drown it out maybe with Sanghyuk’s laugh. Sanghyuk’s laugh… Youngbin loves the sound of his laugh because it has the ability to liven up a whole room. He’s seen it happen before. And he wants to see it happen again…

Youngbin’s brain sprung into action and adrenaline surged through his body. Sanghyuk! He needs to find Sanghyuk!

He sits up in a flash, wanting to not dither, but it has the unfortunate side effect of making him feel dizzy and nauseous. 

"Woah, woah, woah! Careful there, you might knock your brain out of your skull with that speed." 

Youngbin is very irritated and he says as much.

"Who are you? Don't touch me! I need to find my husband!" Youngbin has a hand to his head trying to stop the throbbing or at least ease it. He's not even sure what he's saying right now, he just needs to focus and find Sanghyuk.

With the rain and his dizziness combined, the darkness of the forest swells around him.

  
  


-

  
  


Jaeyoon is a devout forest ranger. He knows the forest inside out, he knows everything that lives here, and he also knows that total idiots happen to enter the forest and the mountain it resides on for recreational reasons. These idiots usually end up not coming back. Probably too traumatised from getting lost or getting chased by some wild animal. Wild hogs took residence in the mountain, and not many heed the warnings at the foot of the mountain.

The storm that ravaged the forest presently would usually keep him in his little cabin, but he had a gut feeling that he should survey the forest. The change in weather had been sudden and not forecasted. This often meant trouble.

It was mildly surprising to see a man washed up on the bank of the stream turned river on the mountain. The man was lucky, Jaeyoon thought as he rushed over to him.

Jaeyoon shouts over the rain. He checks the man’s pulse as he does it - there’s a steady, strong heartbeat. Jaeyoon breathes out in relief, but he should get the man to his cabin so he can check him for any injuries. 

The man sits up and Jaeyoon isn’t fast enough to hold him down. In the next few moments, the man trips and slips and stumbles in the mud, all while babbling about finding his husband and also telling Jaeyoon that he is irritated.

The situation is worse than Jaeyoon assumed, then.

“What’s your name?” Jaeyoon asks. The man tries to push Jaeyoon away. Jaeyoon takes his hand in his own. “I can help you! Hey! Listen, I can help you!” 

He’s concussed, that much is obvious when he can’t exactly focus his gaze on Jaeyoon. 

The man whispers to Jaeyoon, probably not able to control the volume of his voice. Jaeyoon moves forward so the man’s lips are near his ear.

“Youngbin… I think… I feel- I’m feeling really dizzy, but. But I need to find Sanghyuk.”

Jaeyoon nods, although Youngbin might not be able to register it. 

“I’m going to bring you back to the forest ranger’s cabin, and then I’ll go look for him. Okay?”

A nod. Good. At least Youngbin can register what he’s saying even if he’s dizzy. There’s always a chance that the person who sustains the concussion won’t be able to register what someone says to them.

Jaeyoon saddles Youngbin up onto his back. When he stands up straight, he thinks that maybe a fireman lift would have been better because of the mud. He slips but he has some killer thighs(or so Inseong says), so he should manage it.

He has a distant thought, that if this had been a quiet night he would have felt lonely and bored sitting in the cabin by himself. The forest rangers always stay up here for 2 weeks at a time. Sometimes with company, sometimes with none. Jaeyoon’s alone this time, which wouldn’t have been half as sad if his best friend hadn’t just moved across the country away from him. He doesn’t begrudge Inseong, but he misses him so much.

After several near slips, Jaeyoon and Youngbin reach the cabin. It’s not small, but not huge. Jaeyoon feels comforted by the heat that greets them. The fireplace held only embers now, but with a blanket, Youngbin would surely warm up quick. 

Jaeyoon places Youngbin on the small couch and fetches him a blanket.

“I’m going to go find him. You can lie down if you need to. And if it feels lonely, there’s a radio on the table although I can’t promise that you’ll get any signal,” says Jaeyoon, stooped down with his knees bent to look at Youngbin’s face.

Youngbin looks dazed but he nods nonetheless.

Jaeyoon finds a walkie-talkie in the drawer that’s usually reserved for when someone else is working with him. He hands it to Youngbin.

“If you need to contact me, you can use this. And when I find him, I’ll let you know, okay?”

The stare is a bit more focussed now. Another nod.

Jaeyoon leaves the cabin, locking the door once again.


	3. Chapter 3

The rain is not as brutal. The storm seems to be settling a bit. 

Jaeyoon yearns for his bed as he traverses throughout the forest, but he has to push through. 

He starts searching from where he found Youngbin. Following the stream is an uphill battle as there are quite a few places where the earth has been washed away. Looking for Sanghyuk by following the stream seems like his best bet at the moment, but if that brings no luck then he’ll probably have to call search and rescue. 

The stream roars beside him. Jaeyoon hopes it won’t break up any of the paths beside it, but knows it already has and he’ll have to reroute them. The job is rewarding, but it has its annoyances.

Jaeyoon is just about to lose hope when he spots something. And upon closer inspection, he sees there’s a man lying in the mud and judging from the trail behind him, he had been pulling himself through the mud. 

Jaeyoon got down on all-fours to see the man’s eyes were barely open and yet he still continues dragging himself, even though he makes no progress.

“Hello! Are you Sanghyuk?”

“Yeah... Who are you?” Sanghyuk sleepily asks. He’s tired, that much is obvious to Jaeyoon. 

“My name is Jaeyoon! I found Youngbin!” Jaeyoon shouts over the noise of the stream and the wind.

Sanghyuk’s head jolts up and he looks worried, with eyes that are too widely open. 

“Is he okay?” His voice sounds wrecked. Jaeyoon can only imagine the stress Sanghyuk has been through, and he already has a gist what Youngbin has been through.

Jaeyoon replies, “Yes! He’s safe! Are you injured?!” 

Sanghyuk sighs in relief. “Yeah! My ankle is fucked!”

Looks like Jaeyoon is going to have to carry him just like he did with Youngbin. He ascertains that piggybacking Sanghyuk is their best bet if Jaeyoon is to keep his footing. 

With some adept manoeuvring on Jaeyoon’s part, he manages to lift Sanghyuk without hurting his ankle too much. 

When Sanghyuk feels secure enough, Jaeyoon asks, “Is this okay?”

Sanghyuk nods and rasps, “Yeah.”

Jaeyoon braces himself to get them both back to the cabin safely.

Oh, what a night this had turned out to be.

-

Sanghyuk wonders just how did he end up here. How did both of them end up here?

This trip had begun so beautifully, but soon it was torn to shreds by a lack of communication and an unwillingness to work together. Because that’s exactly what a relationship is, isn’t it? Working together. Helping each other get through the day. 

It certainly was not fighting in a forest on a mountain, falling and injuring your ankle because of a sudden storm, and then watching your boyfriend fall into a stream while you watch helplessly, unable to do anything. 

Sanghyuk hated it. He hated today. 

He is well aware that this feeling of frustration comes from his exhaustion, injury, and emotional distress. But he doesn’t think it’s  _ that _ unreasonable.

The clock in the cabin ticks away the seconds.

Sanghyuk can’t find sleep. Every time he shuts his eyes, images of Youngbin falling flash behind his eyelids, unbidden. 

So instead, he stares into the darkness that lies in the cabin. Through the darkness, he can make out the forms of Youngbin and their saviour, Jaeyoon. 

They are both sleeping, although Youngbin sleeps because of his concussion. Jaeyoon mentioned that they’d need to wake him up in a few hours in the morning when the helicopter can come and fly them away.

After they get out of the hospital and figure things out, Sanghyuk will need to come back and thank Jaeyoon. Gratitude is a much better feeling than panic, huh? 

Sanghyuk lets the gratitude fill his heart. He doesn’t imagine the worst possible scenario, instead, he thinks of how relieved he felt when Jaeyoon found him, how relieved he felt when Jaeyoon had told him Youngbin was okay.

Jaeyoon wrapped his ankle when they got to the cabin (after Sanghyuk had cried at the sight of a delirious Youngbin who woke from the sound of him blubbering). He’d done it with so much care and gentleness. His ankle felt so snug and only throbbed rather than searing with pain, Sanghyuk had almost teared up at the relief.

And when Sanghyuk had thanked Jaeyoon, Jaeyoon’s smile comforted him.

“You’re safe now, Sanghyuk. Let me know if you need anything more.”

Distantly, Sanghyuk knows he is growing too attached to Jaeyoon too soon. Although he hopes they could be friends.

Soon enough, he falls asleep.

-

“I think we should take a break,” Youngbin says, out of nowhere.

Sanghyuk is lying on his hospital bed across from Youngbin’s. He had been playing sudoku, with his tongue sticking out in concentration.

The nurses mentioned discharge to Youngbin that morning as he had almost healed, But Sanghyuk was gonna have to stay put for a few more days due to an acute infection from a cut on his ankle. A cut that both Youngbin and Jaeyoon, the forest ranger, had missed. 

Sanghyuk is beginning to think that he too missed a cut, but instead of it being physical, it was a cut in his and Youngbin’s relationship. Maybe his blind optimism had deceived him. His heart panged with pain as he began to wish he hadn’t run out of the cabin that night.

After a while of just thinking, Sanghyuk realises that he hasn’t answered Youngbin. He doesn’t know where to start, his brain numb as it tries to comprehend the information. As usual, Sanghyuk feels like blaming himself.

“It was the fight, wasn’t it?” Sanghyuk asks tenderly and carefully as if Youngbin were a wild animal he might scare off.

A flicker of guilt came over Youngbin’s face before he redirected his gaze to his feet. 

“The fight… it made me realise how stupid and immature I am, Sanghyuk. I need to figure out some things. I need to figure out what I’m doing, what my purpose is. Not everything is under my control, but I never realised that until I felt like I could lose you.” Youngbin lifts his gaze once again, pinning Sanghyuk with an earnest stare. It makes Sanghyuk feel breathless.

Youngbin adds, “Don’t blame yourself, ‘Hyuk. It’s not your fault.”

Sanghyuk feels tears gather in the corner of his eyes. He hates how Youngbin can see right through him. 

The numbers on the page of his sudoku book are starting to blur. Sanghyuk nods before they become totally incomprehensible.

“Okay, sure,” Sanghyuk says as he rubs the tears that are running down his cheeks, away. He returns to his sudoku, even though he can’t read anything and his mind is running too fast for concentration. 

-

Later, Youngbin leaves as Sanghyuk is napping in the warm afternoon sun that stretches across his bed. Before he leaves he says, with a kiss to Sanghyuk’s forehead, “I love you.”

When Youngbin steps across the threshold of the room and into the corridors of the hospital, Sanghyuk whispers into the empty room,

“I love you too.”


End file.
